Complete utter chaos
Ringing school bells cut sharply through my latest train of
thought as I scrambled to my feet knocking my knee against the nearest chair
leg in the process . “Ow”, I muttered, wondering why I was hearing the bell now
as it has been more than ten years since I completed school. And then there was
the annoyingly persistent banging of my rickety windows signalling that the
winds were having their day of fun again. I immediately put my fingers to my
ears and forced my eyes open to take in a frantic glimpse of my surroundings. I
was still in my room and as far as I could see, the windows were bolted shut
and I had a faint memory of triple checking them last night before snuggling
underneath my cozy blankets.
The noises in my head were showing no signs of dissipating
and were now accompanied by more disturbing ones. The lines of some familiar
song were being played again and again indicating that the record player was
stuck, there was a shrill, ear -piercing sound of a swing going back and forth
on a children’s park and many more. My heart seemed to want to beat at the same
rate as these nerve-wracking sounds and it was only a matter of time before I
completely lost it. I could feel my breathing accelerate and I was panting like
I had just run ten miles non-stop. It would have been hilarious and unthinkable
if not for the seriousness of this situation, as I don’t run at all.
I reasoned with my brain to make some sense of what was
undoubtedly utter chaos but this was one of those rarest of all times when my
brain would not budge. “What was the point of being academically intelligent
when you cannot get a grip on yourself?”. I despaired.
Suddenly, I heard
footsteps outside my door , followed by inconsistent banging and then a little
figure stormed inside. Amidst all the chaos inside my brain, I heard a faint
voice calling my name and I found myself staring at two little innocent eyes which
were currently shadowed with confusion. I looked down at my little brother who
apparently was in a great state of excitement and was desperate to show me
something.
As I focused all my attention on him, the sounds began to
disappear, my breathing slowed down to regular and my fingers finally
un-clenched themselves. With a huge smile on my face, I placed the little one on
my lap and let out a huge sigh of relief that the battle with my panic was
finally over, for now.
Girl in a daze
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